Good Old Bert's

So I work at this music store that we're going to call Bert's.  Bert's is usually really slow during the summer.  It's July right now.  Thus we can infer that Bert's is really slow right now.  That's why I'm blogging while I'm at work.  It's so slow that I really have nothing better to do.  It's so slow that I can't make compound sentences.  End of story.

The good news is that working here again basically guarantees me a steady full-time job that pays better than before my mission when I worked here.  That's definitely a must when you're looking to be engaged and married in the near future (not that I know how near that future is yet, but I'm really hoping it's soon).  I guess it's all good, because it means I'm getting paid to mostly just sit around for 7-8 hours a day and do sales (which I love) for the time that I'm not sitting.  I think the only things that would make this better would be:

1) Making much more money (but let's be honest, that's not going to happen)
2) Being able to get away with playing guitar more while I'm here. 

I have this at my disposal:

And I can't even take advantage of it.  That's looking at just one wall of the store.  Granted, the other walls aren't covered in guitars, but we have plenty more.  That's all I'm trying to say.

Anyway, I just thought I'd give you all that wonderful insight into my days, except Tuesdays, from 10-6, just chillin' at Bert's.

Sacrifices

I relearned an important lesson this week from Alyssa.  It certainly wasn't easy, and I'm just hoping it'll be worth it, but it all remains to be seen.

Basically Alyssa wants to take things slower than I do.  She wants time to make sure she's absolutely sure of what we're going to do before she'll commit.  I don't necessarily agree with that kind of thinking, but that doesn't change the fact that she does think like that.  On Friday, we had a long, serious talk about it.  I came to the conclusion that if I want things to work out, I'll have to do it at her pace and give up all of my desires and the feelings I've had to be married sooner.  I did it in return for her openness and nothing more.

I remembered my mission and the lessons I learned in that time.  I remembered that charity is a powerful force for good, and that it requires us to put others above ourselves and consider their needs and desires before our own.  I remembered the promises I've made with the Lord to sacrifice all that I have for Him and His kingdom.  I realized that if I really love Alyssa as much as I think I do, I should do the same things for her.

I took the decision to drop my own wants and needs in order to satisfy hers.  I'm going to be patient with her and let her figure this out in her own time.  In the meantime, I'll be doing all that I can to remind her how much I really do love her.  I'm doing it all on the conviction I have that God grants according to our righteous desires when we act in faith.  I have no guarantee that she'll get an answer, that the answer will be me, or that she'll want to be married as soon as I'd like.

That's really what faith is, though.  It's stepping out into the dark, knowing that God will put solid ground under our feet even though we can't even fathom it being there.  When we do it enough, we begin to see, and light fills our life.  Eventually, we see enough to understand that there may or may not have even been solid ground when we took that first step, but God put it there because we acted with complete trust in Him.  He won't let us fall if we exercise faith in Him.

So here I am, stepping out into the dark, waiting for the girl I love to come around to the idea of marrying me, not knowing if she ever will, but willing to wait until she does.  No sacrifice is too great for me if it means having her forever.

Thankfully, we had just been to a great MoTab concert before that Friday night conversation.  Absolutely an inspired decision.

Also, many thanks to our other friend Alyssa who helped me feel better about the decision before the confirmation of it came.

"Stressful Situations"

Well yesterday was an excellent day for the both of us.  We just keep getting closer and closer, and that definitely bodes well for the future I hope we can have.

When I first got back and we were looking at what we wanted to do together, we thought it would be good to be in some "stressful situations" to see how the other responds and get to know each other in that sense as well.  We've been trying to come up with stuff like that, but so far to no avail.  Yesterday gave us a great, unexpected opportunity to experience that.

We hiked up that back of Timpanogos yesterday, so driving up there, Alyssa's car was struggling big time.  When we pulled into the lot, her car starts smoking and what not, so we open the hood to find a ripped hose and antifreeze everywhere.  We let her dad know and went hiking.

On this hike, there's a nice little waterfall, and we hiked to one of the ledges of the waterfall.  I jumped down a rock, and the pocket with her car keys ripped and the keys fell into this miniature raging torrent and were probably almost carried down a thirty foot drop and lost forever.  Thankfully, they got caught on a rock and I went in to get them.  Getting down to the rock they were caught on, I slipped and got both feet soaking wet.  Thankfully, we got the keys.

This is where we almost lost the keys

Adventure #2 was that it started raining right about then, so we started heading down the mountain.  We got caught in a pretty good downpour and got soaked.

We got wet

Adventure #3 was waiting for her dad to come and finally having to worry about fixing the car.  Thankfully, her dad's a car wizard, so he got things all fixed up and we made it home safe.

It's funny how the things you most look for sometimes come when you just aren't looking for them.  That's maybe been a hallmark in mine and Alyssa's relationship, and I'm very grateful for that.  She came at a time when I least wanted a real relationship, but it's turned out to be one of the things that makes me happiest in my life.  I'm sure glad God knows what we need and when we need it.  I'm also glad that I've learned to accept that fact and just be happy when good things come, even unexpectedly.

Today I'll be expecting a definitive answer from Alyssa in regards to our future and what we're going to do.  I'll keep you posted.

I sure love that girl

Episode 1: Part 2

If you've forgotten where we left off in the story, just go back and read it.  A recap is basically pointless on a blog.

So after the initial contact was established, we started talking more and establishing an actual friendship.  After having stunned me with her beauty, she sealed the deal with her wit, humor, and general goodness.  I could tell I was way out of my league trying to start a relationship with her, but that feeling lingered quite poignantly and I had to do something about it.  In the ensuing months, we continued along those lines and started eating lunch together at school.

Later, we ended up doing another musical together, and I started making it clear where I was hoping we could go.  We started talking more, I got her phone number, and started picking her up for rehearsals and performances.  We could both tell there was something developing, but we were both a little too timid to just come out and say it.  Some of my fondest memories with Alyssa were during this time when I wanted her so bad, but still couldn't have her, so I just had to make due with what we had.

Towards the end of that production, she asked me to a school dance, which I gladly accepted, though I had been waiting to ask her to prom as our first date.  We went to the dance and had a great time together.  As per tradition among my friends, we all came to my house after so I could play them some music and we could all sing along (I don't know how that tradition started, but whatever).  As everyone filed out, I prepared to say goodbye to Alyssa.  When we were the last ones in my house, we hugged goodnight, and oh what a hug it was.  I recall it was literally painful to have to separate from that, not knowing if the future would have any more of those.

(sorry about the terrible quality... that's a picture from my phone of a picture of that first date)

Around this time, we started to catch on to the other's feelings and began hinting at a relationship.  One of our friends (also named Alyssa) was an excellent mediator and helped me realize that I was being a pansy and that I should just tell Alyssa I wanted to be with her because she wanted to be with me, too.  It was still too good to be true for me (and really still is) that she would want anything to do with me.  Eventually, I got up the courage to go talk to her about it, and this wonderful relationship was born.

There's much more to the story than that, but those are the very basics (and boy was I long-winded in telling just the basics!).  Maybe more will come out in future posts, but we'll see.

Here's an update: Things are now starting to really move along.  After that last talk we had and Alyssa getting some sound advice from her mom, we're starting to make legitimate, quick progress.  I won't give out any specific details yet, but there are good things to come in the near future, all of which I will let you all know.

Every saga has a beginning...

It's looking like the majority of these first posts are going to be just introductory.  Upon creating this, it was really just for me, but if people are going to be seeing it, they may as well get the whole story.  Plus I love telling it.

Today I shall tell you how Alyssa and I came to be.  Pop some corn and fasten your seat belts.

First, it would be helpful to know that my older sister and Alyssa's older sister were best friends in high school.  Unbeknownst to us, that would come very much in handy.

Alyssa and I attended the same high school.  I'm a year older than she, and all of this went down in my senior year (her junior year).  If you know me, you know that I'm a musician through and through.  It's basically an essential part of me in a very deep sense.  Being my senior year, I wanted to take advantage of all of the opportunities I could to play music in every situation that I could.  I volunteered to accompany people, got in every music class I could (like 6 of my 8 classes were ensembles or independent study or free periods where I could practice... for reals), joined several bands, and took every other chance I got to play music.  Most significant of these was a certain musical produced by the high school.

I had no idea what the musical was about or what the music was like, but I signed up right away to play guitar in it.  Little did I know that decision would change my life forever.  I remember very clearly the first day of rehearsals.  I was already all set up in the band room (I basically spent my life in there anyway) warming up.  This musical (Aida) required two pianists, but there was only one piano in the band room.  As the director was asking for help to bring in the second piano, she directed my attention to a certain stunningly gorgeous girl with short blonde hair, dazzling blue eyes, and heeled boots... to boot (good one, right?).  Needless to say, I was floored.

At that very moment, I had the strongest feeling that I needed to meet that girl, go out with her, and eventually marry her.  This was totally unexpected, especially with the state I was in at the time.  I'd just been through a rough breakup and was not looking for any significant other besides more guitars.  My theme song at the time was "I Don't Believe in Love" by Queensryche (great song, by the way).  Fortunately, that feeling that came was almost literally overpowering and I let my resistance dissipate.  I didn't know why I felt that or where it came from, but I knew that it felt right and that I needed to follow it.

Quickly, I volunteered to help move a piano (I wouldn't have normally done that...), and started trying to figure out how to strike up a conversation with this girl.  Unfortunately for me, I was a social outcast in high school.  I couldn't talk to someone new or make a new friend to save my life, so that plan failed epically.  That cycle continued for the next few rehearsals, and we eventually began practicing in the auditorium, which worked out great.  In the band room, she sat on the other side of the room from me; in the auditorium, she sat right behind me.  One day, after mustering a whole lot of courage, I decided to talk to her.  I used the only real piece of information I had about her: the connection between our sisters.  She had also realized it, but wasn't sure, so didn't say anything.  Thus was the beginning of what would become one of the most special relationships in my life.

I'd like to just finish there and say "the rest is history", but that would be a huge lie.  Unfortunately, I'm a little detailed in my storytelling, so this will be the end of part 1 of episode 1.  Stay tuned for more action, adventure, romance, and laughs as the saga continues!

Overture

I figured that if I'm going to have a blog about Alyssa and I, you may as well know a little bit about us.  So joining me today is a special guest star blogger: the one and only Alyssa!  I will be introducing her, and she will be introducing me.  Enjoy.



Alyssa:
If I were to describe Alyssa in a word, I probably couldn't.  I can say this independent of the fact that I'm madly in love with her: she is just an all-around amazing girl.  She's incredibly smart, beautiful, witty, and spiritual.  She's especially good at keeping me where I need to be.  Her head fits right in my shoulder when we're both standing and sitting.  She has beautiful blue eyes that are much more impressive than mine and excellent, long, blonde hair (that she grew out at my request... score!).  She's sensible, practical, and has a great new fashion sense.

I could probably go on and on for maybe forever, but that gives you a general idea.  There's also a good chance that more will come out as I keep writing about she and I, but that's a good enough start.  Now let's hope she doesn't tear into me too much and reveal all of my embarrassing defects...



Joseph:
Here's the thing. Joe is the most loving person ever. I know people brag on their significant others all the time, but there's a good chance I could trump any one of you. But wait, there's more! He's also very spiritual, creative, hard-working, musical, and he's got a fine sense of humor. He willingly gives beyond the point where everyone else would say they can give no more. He has a talent for calming people down, but most especially me. He's the perfect size. Actually, he is--for me--practically perfect in every way. I love this boy.

Oh. He also loves John Petrucci, like A LOTTTTTT.

Now you can put some faces with those names, but you have to guess which is which.

Latest updates: There have been no signs of any decrease or stagnancy in what I feel for Alyssa, which is great.  Quite the contrary, I can tell that my feelings are growing stronger, deeper, and more mature every day.  I feel good about where we're going, but she still wants time to be sure.  Basically that sucks for me, but I'm working hard on patience and understanding.  The good news is that I gained some much needed perspective after talking to her last night, so I think I can manage for now.

Let's set the record straight

Those of you who know me will wonder "what the heck is Joe doing blogging?"  Well let me tell you:

Those of you who know me happen to know that I just got back from living in Mexico as a missionary for 2 years.  My girlfriend waited for me that whole time and now we're looking at a future together.  You also know that I'm a fairly introverted and thoughtful person.  That's a really bad combination.

I'm not blogging to have people read about my life or to get attention.  I'm not blogging because I love doing cutesy things.  I just need a dang outlet!  Having kept everything inside for the last 21  years of my life, I've come to realize that it's not the best way to do things.

And thus, a blog was born.

There's a good chance this won't be very creative or fun.  Followers: be ye warned.  There's a good chance only pirates would ever say that.  Anyway, here's to the start of a new expressive outlet for me and maybe a few fun adventures along the way.

Questions?  Comments?  Concerns?  That's what the "comment" section is for.

There are no guarantees as to how frequent I'll be, but if you're really super interested in knowing all about what I think about and do, you'll find out eventually, and I'll make an effort to be at least a little bit consistent.  The good news for you all is that until I find a second job, I'm free almost all day, every day.  All it'll take to have constant updates is my wanting to.  The bad news is that all of my free time is spent looking for a second job.  Kind of a buzzkill, I know.  You can deal with it.

Please enjoy this half-rancid mamey.  Also, it had two seeds instead of just one.  That was cool